loveschildren | (no subject)

I'd rather have nothing.

[He leans down, intimate, and kisses Glen's forehead.]

You'd die. And I won't let you do that.

[He flinches, flushing in annoyance, embarrassment, and affection all at once.]

You can't stop me forever.

[He pets Glen's face, giving him all the affection he's starved for.]

I can stop you for now. You're working yourself up. Just relax and give in for a while, you can go back to brooding about things after you've indulged at least, it'll be plenty of ammunition for a good sulk.

[Felid's right about that much. He is working himself up. And he would use giving in to beat himself up more later. But that doesn't mean he should just do it. Then again, he's already learned there's no getting out of it, so maybe if he does give in Felid will go away faster.]

You're the one that won't shut up. I can't love you when you're talking.

A relationship can't work without communication, my dear. It's important that we're open with each other.

[He kisses Glen again, soft and warm and nothing like the violence Glen used to get.]

We're not in a relationship. I never agreed to that.

[He's protesting, but it's a half-hearted mumble against Felid's lips, and he's leaning into him now, just a little. He can't escape this. He can't get away from Felid or this place, the position Felid's put him in or the feelings Felid's programmed into him. So he may as well at least try not to drive himself insane quite so quickly.]

Ah.

[Felid's breath is warm against Glen's lips and he still tastes very faintly of blood. His tone is ever so gentle and polite as he speaks, still barely brushing his lips over Glen's with the words.]

Will you let me court you Glen? I would very much like to have your consent to a relationship.

[Not because he cares about Glen's consent, but because it's fun to do this to Glen, to act like her cares, to give Glen things that are close to pleasant.]

You can try to woo me all you want, but I won't give in to you that much.

[He will, however, give in enough to touch Felid's face, sliding his hands over his cheeks and up into his hair. It's soft. It makes his chest warm to feel it, to thread his fingers through that silky mane and imagine, somewhere deep down, that this is a person who really loves him and who is his to love back.

If only. Maybe in some other reality Felid's not a piece of shit, or Glen isn't cursed with a conscience, and it would work out. But this isn't that reality.]

Then pretend for a while, if only to feel less lonely.

[Felid leans into the touch, cuddly and more than a little affectionate. It'd be easy to accept that really, if Glen weren't so stubborn.]

[He's made of stubbornness, sadly. But he can pretend, wrapping his arms around Felid's neck and resting his forehead against his. It's not that different from all the years he spent insisting that it was fine to give himself up, as long as it was his choice. This is just another form of selling himself for his own gain. Right? Right. If he closes his eyes he can tell himself he's just coping. Biding his time. He just needs to keep himself together til he gets a chance to get away.]

Please stop talking about it for now. I have to work up to that much bullshitting.

As you wish, Glen dear.

[He strokes his fingers through Glen's hair, perfectly content with Glen's response, wrapping his arms around the man and letting this cute little scene continue without further comment to ruin it.]

[He stays there, quiet, not looking, and lets himself drift again, mentally. He tries to imagine it's somewhere else and something else, and gradually he relaxes. It's fine. This is fine. He's just letting himself feel good, indulging in the touch and the smell and the presence of someone he loves. For the moment he can edit out the fact that it's also someone he loathes, and kiss him gently.]

[Well if you squint and tilt your head and try really hard--it'll still be Felid kissing you back. But he's being good, not talking, letting the kiss be passionate but not terribly demanding, keeping Glen close with arms around him, leaning over him and generally being terribly romantic in his mannerisms.]

[It's definitely still Felid. But Glen's getting really good at tricking himself -- or more accurately he's just already gone far enough out of his mind that it's not too hard to just wander off into a place where this doesn't bother him. In that place, all he feels is the pleasant warmth that comes with pressing up against Felid, holding on tight and kissing him til he's breathless and openly wanting.]

[Glen drifting off into not caring is a sweet victory, and Felid trails his fingers down the man's chest, following with kisses to Glen's neck, lightly biting at the skin for a little more excitement and stimulation, humming his pleasure at Glen's willingness before biting down just a little harder.]

[He doesn't bother to stifle his reaction, moaning softly at the bites and clinging, dragging his fingernails down Felid's back. It's alright, just to feel the physical pleasure. A little something good counters everything that's terrible if he just lets it, and helps him keep afloat.]

[He doesn't let up, picking Glen up and taking him to his sulking pile of pillows, laying him down and lavishing kisses along his neck, down his chest when he rids Glen of his shirt.]

Ah-- Wait--

[No, he doesn't want to ruin his sulking spot, he knows that much. But he also doesn't want to break the spell of not-miserable he's put on himself, so he doesn't protest very hard, just putting his hands against Felid's chest and not quite relaxing, even while he still gasps at Felid's kisses.]

[Of course it's deliberate, he's a cat. He wants to shed all over the thing Glen doesn't want him to shed on. He leans back and kisses Glen's fingers, his palm, licks his wrists and bites instead of backing off or waiting, but it feels nice and it;s gentle.]

Felid--

[It'd been way too long since he'd had this kind of touch, before Felid brought him here. Things with Mahiru weren't so sweet, and other than her his experience was, with a few exceptions, mainly Felid being rough and violent. Eight years of that and it's no wonder he caves so quickly to being treated gently, attentively, like he's cared for, even when it's a lie. He tugs at Felid's shirt, squirming and letting his free hand slide down just a little. His face is deeply flushed and it's hard to concentrate on caring where they are, so long as he feels good and wanted and not awful for once.]

[Felid can be a gentle lover when he wants, as he demonstrates, unbuttoning his own shirt for Glen with a deep, throaty chuckle and kissing the inside of Glen's elbow, moving forward to kneel over the man, kissing him again, warm and passionate, trailing affectionate touches along Glen's skin as he undresses him.]

How beautiful you are.

[He whispers soft endearments to Glen, what any lover would say to make their partner feel wanted and special.]

I thought I wasn't, anymore.

[He can't resist making a crack, but he's leaning into Felid's kiss and Felid's touches at the same time. His own hands are far more caring than they used to be as he slides his palms over Felid's chest and shoulders, pushing his shirt off as he goes and taking his time to feel his skin in a way he never would have before.]

[He feels nice, soft and smooth because he is far too fussy about his appearance. he nips Glen's lip for the sass, working at his belt and moving to kiss his neck, unhurried but not taking forever to get him naked, either.]

Don't ruin the moment.

You're-- mm... I want to move.

[He wants to do this in the real bed. It's just hard to concentrate on that when he's disconnected and feeling nice. He doesn't stop undressing Felid or responding to him, he just whines while he's doing it.]